WWF Gorilla Top (Forever 21), Black Maxi (handmedown), Blue Velvet Flats (Urban Outfitters)

I'm at that point where I look in closet and I think," Shit. I really have nothing to wear." My size keeps changing in the last few months. If only, I grew taller. Let's be frank, my bra size is bigger than my mom's now. And she has had 2 kids. Stop. Growing. Or stop eating meat. Come on, it's beach time... which reminds me. Coming back to Cali? Of course, there's some self-deserved, mandatory beach pics.

Honestly, I haven't really been obsessively following the new fashion trends like I have been in the past. Tomorrow, I have an interview with Zara and I'm very excited. I've been a huge fan of their brand for years, but sadly I only own one item of clothing from there. They are known to be a "low-budget" brand, but truthfully, their pricing is way above my budget. I just bought a Chanel-looking jacket for $25.99 from a thrift store, and thought I went a bit crazy.

Cigars and Bonfires

Black Jacket (H&M Divided), Vintage Shirt (hand-me-down), Jeans (Kensie Girl), Ankle Boots (Kelsie Dagger), Belt (Kelsie Dagger)

Legal issues are a pain in the ass.

On another note, I'd like to go hiking again. And see a waterfall.

Guess I missed the end of the world

Plaid Cutout Shirt (DIY), Velvet Dress (vintage), White Flats (American Eagle)

I'm not afraid to say that I'm currently blogging while taking a strawberry-bathsalt-scented bubble bath. The water of my tub is a glorious tint of pink. An ironic, nice contrast to the grimness of the Breaking Bad episode that I'm currently watching.

Coming home to warm Cali has been nice. Saw most of my OG lovers. Laughed obnoxiously in public due to a happy green plant. But I'm ready to fly back though tomorrow. Nervous, but ready.

2012, kiss my ass.

Blubber

Christmas Eve: went to a wedding of someone I did not know. Asians know how to celebrate holidays. #sarcasm

Anyways, after trying on dresses during a random mall run with my mom, I realized that flowy dresses look like nightgowns on me. To my chagrin, I realized that I only look acceptable (ironically) in tighter dresses. Fuck curves, fuck sucking in my stomach rolls.

Sometimes it takes forever.

Grey Graphic Shirt (UNIF), Brown Cutoff Shorts (BDG), Black Converse, Sunglasses (vintage)

Sucking at college. Feeling the bitter stabs of winter (literally. I mean the weather), while listening to the most depressing music. So far, life is good.

The Week Before Learning Adulthood.

White Collared Shirt (vintage), Coral Skirt (H&M), Mary-Janes (mom's)

Officially moved into college three-or-so weeks ago. Tipsy nights. 15-or-so people crowded into my dorm. 8 people sleeping in it. Me waking up on the floor of my own dorm while 2 other people are laying in it. Mothered 3 puking, unconcious beings in the span of 3 days. Walked with aimless ambition. Getting somewhere. Falling asleep while people are making out, eating pizza, screaming, reckless craze happens around me.

I will get used to this.

Genetically Delinquent

Black Backless Sequin Dress (vintage), Black Shorts (Whale), White Heels (Simply Vera), Ring (H&M)

Taken at my little sister's piano contest. As soon as she got onstage, I balled out crying. Cried even more when they announced that she won first place.

Though I loved this dress, I felt a little self-conscious in an outfit this short at a piano convention. Hmm, maybe I should rethink the where and what next time.

Tamers Were Once Wild.

Leopard Coat (secondhand), Black Shirt (J. Crew), Black Fringe Skirt (Wetseal), DIY Black Socks, White Mary Janes (vintage), DIY Silver Cross

2 and 1/2 weeks left until I'm done. Time for road trips and finally living life. Let's hope.

Asking for Nothing, Receiving More.

Rainbow Scarf (handmedown), Button-down shirt (Tommy Hilfiger), DIY White Skirt (F21), Leather Belt (Levi's), Oxfords (Candies)

I don't know if I've told y'all, but I've decided where I will further continue my education: Indiana University. And I'm scared shitless. After years wanting to explore other states, reality has hit me and I realized how "unique" the transition might. Gaze your eyes on these sunny photos of California. For a decade of my life, this what I'm used to. Don't get me wrong, for the 3-4 years I've lived in Cananda, I loved it. The snow, the seasons. But now, in Indiana, I'm venturing out on my own. Where the White population is 87.8% and the minority population in IU is 9%. Me and 9 Fucking Percent. Scream with me.
Of course, I'm more anxious than frightened. Getting out would be a change, but I've been craving independence. And snow.

Anyhoo, these are some photos from our visit to UCSC. That college has the most gorgeous campus. It's more like a forest and within there just happened to be glasses and wooden buildings. What swayed me away unfortunately was the fact that it did not include my major. If I can combine the grandoise of IU and the beauty of UCSC then next year would be perfect.

Inhale All That is Left.

Beige Blazer (vintage), Polkadot Dress (vintage), Black Woven Belt (garagesale), White Shorts (secondhand), White/Black Oxford (Candies), DIY Dotted Sunglasses (ebay--dots painted w/ nail polish)

AP testing starts next week. Right after, we are breaking hell until it comes loose.

Soundtracks of Existentialists.

White Wool Coat (made by mom), Graphic Shirt (secondhand), White Shorts (vintage), White Dotted Tights (F21)

Funniest story all week: So my AP Psych teacher received a free 3-day trip on a cruise ship. Unfortunately the cruise ship's current destination was in Thailand, causing her to buy tickets to this one... errr, city in Thailand. Here is the conversation that became to be: Psychology Teacher: "Hello, I would like to buy tickets to... errr... Phuckit (Phuket)" Travel Agency: "Excuse me?" PT: "Fuck it. Phuckkkiittt. Fackit?" TA: "... What is it NEAR by?" PT: "Bangcock (Bangkok)" TA: "...Where is it?" PT: "It's next to Peepee Island! (Pepe Island)" TA: "... How OLD are you?!" [hangs up phone] Unsurprising since this a teacher who cusses every other sentence. :D I adore her.
april 2011 playlist by jenhz

P.S. I finally got a playlist up and running. Yippee!!!

Your pieces for lunch.

Plaid Jacket (Wetseal Collection), wifebeater tank (dad's), Grey Sheer Skirt (vintage), Black Motorcycle Boots (Calvin Klein)

Current emotion: limbo
Decision making is horrible.

Requesting Bull.

Black Hat (warehouse sale), Black Motorcycle Jacket (H&M Divided), Red Dress (vintage), Silver Cross Necklace (DIY), Gold Belt (vintage), Heart Tights (F21), Suede Boots (Kelsi Dagger)

Ok, so obviously as a teenage girl, I can't help but sometimes obsess over the way I look. Lately, I feel like I gained 10 pounds (even though I don't weigh myself) in muscle and pudge. And I hate it. My legs has gotten insanely bulky. Is there a way to lose muscle? While still being able to work out? Or I am just a bag of improbable contradictions?

Illegal Casualties

White Blazer (Frank Lee), Purple Cardigan (NY & Co.), Printed Top (secondhand), DIY White shorts (secondhand), White Dotted Tights (Forever 21), Leather Belt (Levi), Suede Booties (Kelsi Dagger)

While out in Vegas, I realized how much dating is like gambling. You can either go the easy route and put your bets on something more "attainable" or can go all out and reach for the high stakes. There's a greater chance of losing all your dignity but the outcome if won, will be worth all the anxiety. Both are highly dangerous and ill-advised.